Here I am again - I have a few minutes so I thought I'd take the time to write and update what is going on. After Mom died I found myself constantly wanting to call her - there was something I needed to ask, or something happened and I wanted to tell her all about it. I haven't found myself calling Dad since he died. I do find the house to feel very empty without him. I have been left with so many unanswered questions - answers I can't get from someone else. I'm not trying to say that only Dad knew anything about my questions, it is more that Dad knew so much more about how to garden/farm and how to raise animals the old fashioned way. Of course now they call it organic, but when Dad was young that was the way it had to be done either because that was all they had (no chemical fertilizers and insecticides) or that was how you did it so you didn't waste money. Sounds like just what we need in this day and age, doesn't it!
Dad lived with us for 6 months. It went by so fast, and yet it felt very much like he'd always been there. It just felt right to have him here. Of course Dad always had to be involved in something meaningful. He had to be able to feel like he was contributing and helping. Each day as I go out to feed the chickens and rabbits I see his last "contribution." He died before it could be finished, but it works and we'll get it finished before the end of the summer.
The rabbits and chickens love their home. They each have a place to run and play and I can see where having a free range makes so much difference to the chickens. We have 5 chickens and we get 4 eggs every day. Considering a chicken lays 2 eggs over 3 days we are definitely ahead of the game. and we no longer have food going to waste. What the bunnies don't eat the chickens do. It is a much better way to live. Fresh eggs for breakfast and lots of love from the bunnies! (of course there are the "dinner" rabbits - but we don't have any ready to eat right now) And just so you don't think we eat our pets - there are pet rabbits (mostly a "pet" breed weighs in at less than 8 pounds) and there are "commercial" breeds. Commercial rabbits are BIG - often weighing in at well over 20 lbs. They are raised for fur and meat. They have a higher protein content and less fat than other meats, yet they are really quite tender - even when they are older and are classed as a roaster.
Becky is doing quite well with the rabbits. We've learned some difficult lessons over the years about the care of rabbits. Our most recent was that you really can't just give the rabbits unlimited feed. We have a Holland Lop that has reverted to her ancestral Mini Lop she has perfect proportions - but she is BIG. Holland Lops can only be 4 lbs. Mini Lops are up to 6.5 lbs. And Floppsy is 6 lbs!
Needless to say we won't be breeding her! (Holland Lops were created by breeding Mini Lops and Standard Chinchilla rabbits and selective breeding to get the mini size.)
It had not been my intent to make this entry all about rabbits, but that is safer than opening up my carefully tended box of feelings. I need a little more time before I do that, but I also need to write about events so that they can begin to be history rather than a painful part of life now. At the same time I need to have it be now because I'm not really ready to have Dad be gone. It helps to know that he's with the love of his life, but sometimes this little girl just needs her daddy!
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
My famous fish
Here is the recipe for all of you out there who think you don't like fish. Every time I make this there is a little fight at the dinner table - over who gets the last piece of fish! This will make your most skepticle eater a fish lover forever!
Fish Filets or Steaks (the only requirement here is that it is a mild fish - tilapia or pollach is great - so is cod and that it is fresh (or frozen) one per person (make a couple of extra or you may see someone come to blows!)
Fresh bread crumbs (the easiest way to make this is either in a food processor or blender OR grate frozen bread slices with a corse hand held cheese grater)
1 heaping teaspoon white sesame seeds per slice of bread
Melted butter (you gotta use the real stuff here)
sea salt
thyme (fresh or dried)
fresh pepper to taste
garlic onion lemon or other spices if you LIKE them - I often use a little garlic and herb blend.
prepare a flat bottomed baking dish by either a light spray of pam or rubbing on a little butter. Place the fish on the bottom of the pan so that they are side by side - no overlapping allowed! sprinkle with the thyme and the other herbs cover with the fresh bread crumbs mixed with sesame seeds drizzle lightly with the melted butter - don't soak the bread but don't be too stingy either. Bake at 350 until the fish flakes easily - be careful not to overcook if you are using fillets - they cook REALLY fast. Serve the fish with a fresh salad, a great vegetable, like sauted green beans or brussles sprouts, fruit and a really good bread. You won't have to worry about leftovers! The fish will be moist and flavorful - the breadcrumbs will be crunchy and brown. Even Jon and Beth fought over who got the last piece!
I got this recipe from the New York Times Cookbook. It was written for halibut steaks. I don't really like halibut much, but even it is good cooked like this!
Fish Filets or Steaks (the only requirement here is that it is a mild fish - tilapia or pollach is great - so is cod and that it is fresh (or frozen) one per person (make a couple of extra or you may see someone come to blows!)
Fresh bread crumbs (the easiest way to make this is either in a food processor or blender OR grate frozen bread slices with a corse hand held cheese grater)
1 heaping teaspoon white sesame seeds per slice of bread
Melted butter (you gotta use the real stuff here)
sea salt
thyme (fresh or dried)
fresh pepper to taste
garlic onion lemon or other spices if you LIKE them - I often use a little garlic and herb blend.
prepare a flat bottomed baking dish by either a light spray of pam or rubbing on a little butter. Place the fish on the bottom of the pan so that they are side by side - no overlapping allowed! sprinkle with the thyme and the other herbs cover with the fresh bread crumbs mixed with sesame seeds drizzle lightly with the melted butter - don't soak the bread but don't be too stingy either. Bake at 350 until the fish flakes easily - be careful not to overcook if you are using fillets - they cook REALLY fast. Serve the fish with a fresh salad, a great vegetable, like sauted green beans or brussles sprouts, fruit and a really good bread. You won't have to worry about leftovers! The fish will be moist and flavorful - the breadcrumbs will be crunchy and brown. Even Jon and Beth fought over who got the last piece!
I got this recipe from the New York Times Cookbook. It was written for halibut steaks. I don't really like halibut much, but even it is good cooked like this!
It's all worth it - don't you think?
Well, here I sit at a strange computer on my blog! How interesting the world has become. I no longer need to be home to do things that are home. Like mail (email) or journaling (blog) one wonders what will be next. We have refridgerators that tell us when we need milk. Microwaves that will generate a grocery list based on the food we've eaten. this is beyond anything I could have dreamed up when I was a kid. I'm beginning to feel like my grandmother! Grandma Lundy was born in 1894. She helped her parents run the boarding houses and Inns in burns that people stayed at while traveling on the overland stagecoach. She was famous for her cooking. She made great biscuits and rolls. She was also way ahead of her time in her thinking of nutrition. She never searved a meal (dinner) with less than 2 vegetables (and potatoes are NOT a vegetable) She also always had fruit at those meals. A completely well balanced diet - by today's standards - by someone born more than a hundred years ago. She witnessed travel by stagecoach and horses that changed to trains, busses and cars, the invention of planes and the developement of travel by them and even witnessed the landing of men on the moon! She saw the newfangled typewriter and the invention of the computer. She new the pony express, newspapers, telegraph, telephone, radio and TV. She saw the "War to End all Wars", World War II, The Korean War, and the VietNam War. She saw the developement of the x-ray to be able to diagnose conditions otherwise only "visible" by surgery. She saw the developement of general anesthetic, pennicillin and vaccines for the flu and Polio, as well as whooping cough, diptheria and tetnus. She witnessed the changes brought by childrens immunizations and the obliteration of the dreaded small pox. She saw the changes that made children so much more likely to grow up!
AS children born of the "post war" world we have seen many of these things and more, including the desktop computer that had more "computing" power than the previous desk sized computers. We have seen the computers get smaller and smaller till now you can literally hold one in your hand. We've seen the invention of Cable TV, and Satellite TV, and now TV over the internet. We can call someone on the phone while driving down the road! (I didn't say it was safe - but we CAN do it. We have microwaves that will tell us when our dinner is done after the tough of 2 buttons. Ovens that can bake a sheet of cookies in less than 10 minutes - even MUCH less! We can mix a batch of cookies or bread almost effortlessly in our kitchenaid mixers. Or if we prefer, we can buy the dough ready to bake! Almost any food you could want is available to us ready to pop into the microwave or oven - or even just heat on the stove. Yet my grandmother had to start by chopping the wood, killing, cleaning and plucking the chicken! I too am known as a great cook, but I don't think I could make much of a meal if I had to use grandma's methods! I can make her best biscuits and even her rolls but I can't even imagine having to take all afternoon to get together tonight's dinner. We can have food delivered to us from anywhere in the world - we eat fresh produce in the middle of winter that was shipped from South America or even Austrailia. What a wonderful world we have! Years ago we realized that what happens in our community effects all of us. It is time we realize that the entire world is our community,a nd treat it accordingly. It is time that we realize that we are all the same family, and like all families we can argue and even fight, but when we fo it hurts the whole family. We are brothers and sisters, and the very farthest we are cousins. Hey, you people in the Middel East and Israel. You revere you father, Abraham. You share the same Father and all of you love him. How does a father feel when his children argue and fight? Honor your father and learn to get along. To do less dishonors him. But this is not what I'm sitting here wanting to write about, so let's get back to the subject.
We live in a marvelous world! In 1957, My husband's grandfather got up to speak in church and had a heart attack. No one knew CPR and by the time help arrived there was no help, he had died. My dad is in the hospital right now in the ICU. Monday, early in the morning his heart was failing to pump well enough to circulate his blood, so they "helped" it with CPR. that night when his kidneys were just failing to do a good enough job to be compatible with life, a slow short session of dialisys restored his health. Tuesday morning he woke up ready to take on the world - as long as he didn't have to get out of bed! Today he is concentrating on pass his "swallow test" so he can have real food! And we get to enjoy having him with us for at least a while longer. What a blessing! We can continue to learn from him and his example! Really that makes all the pain and fear worthwhile - don't you think?
AS children born of the "post war" world we have seen many of these things and more, including the desktop computer that had more "computing" power than the previous desk sized computers. We have seen the computers get smaller and smaller till now you can literally hold one in your hand. We've seen the invention of Cable TV, and Satellite TV, and now TV over the internet. We can call someone on the phone while driving down the road! (I didn't say it was safe - but we CAN do it. We have microwaves that will tell us when our dinner is done after the tough of 2 buttons. Ovens that can bake a sheet of cookies in less than 10 minutes - even MUCH less! We can mix a batch of cookies or bread almost effortlessly in our kitchenaid mixers. Or if we prefer, we can buy the dough ready to bake! Almost any food you could want is available to us ready to pop into the microwave or oven - or even just heat on the stove. Yet my grandmother had to start by chopping the wood, killing, cleaning and plucking the chicken! I too am known as a great cook, but I don't think I could make much of a meal if I had to use grandma's methods! I can make her best biscuits and even her rolls but I can't even imagine having to take all afternoon to get together tonight's dinner. We can have food delivered to us from anywhere in the world - we eat fresh produce in the middle of winter that was shipped from South America or even Austrailia. What a wonderful world we have! Years ago we realized that what happens in our community effects all of us. It is time we realize that the entire world is our community,a nd treat it accordingly. It is time that we realize that we are all the same family, and like all families we can argue and even fight, but when we fo it hurts the whole family. We are brothers and sisters, and the very farthest we are cousins. Hey, you people in the Middel East and Israel. You revere you father, Abraham. You share the same Father and all of you love him. How does a father feel when his children argue and fight? Honor your father and learn to get along. To do less dishonors him. But this is not what I'm sitting here wanting to write about, so let's get back to the subject.
We live in a marvelous world! In 1957, My husband's grandfather got up to speak in church and had a heart attack. No one knew CPR and by the time help arrived there was no help, he had died. My dad is in the hospital right now in the ICU. Monday, early in the morning his heart was failing to pump well enough to circulate his blood, so they "helped" it with CPR. that night when his kidneys were just failing to do a good enough job to be compatible with life, a slow short session of dialisys restored his health. Tuesday morning he woke up ready to take on the world - as long as he didn't have to get out of bed! Today he is concentrating on pass his "swallow test" so he can have real food! And we get to enjoy having him with us for at least a while longer. What a blessing! We can continue to learn from him and his example! Really that makes all the pain and fear worthwhile - don't you think?
Friday, November 28, 2008
This has been the best Thanksgiving ever!
I'm up and about - and while I was contemplating the talk I've been asked to give Sunday and the events of the last month I realized it had been almost a month since I did anything in my blog. I'm going to have to watch that because I almost couldn't remember how to do this!
This last Month has been so busy! - Dad came to visit and very soon realized the best thing for him to do was stay. He spent a weekend in the hospital and has had a doctor's appointment almost every day since. Granted many of those appointments were for IV therapy - but still this last month has been basically going from one appointment to another. Dad is suffering now for the hard work and heroic deeds of his "youth". His kidneys aren't doing well and his back is fractured and pinching nerves which is causing a lot of pain. Through it all he is stoically persevering. When the pain makes him grit his teeth and turn pale and green he says, "one thing's for sure - it will start feeling better when it stops hurting!" He bears more without complaint than I would be able to bear and remain conscious. His heart aches for his beloved wife. All in all I wonder which pain is the hardest for him to bear.
Where this last year has been hard - it has not been the hardest year of my life. in many ways it has given me some of my most precious memories. It has also given me the best perspective and appreciation of life and its challenges and blessings. I am so grateful for all the blessings I've been given. For my family, my parents, my brothers and sisters, theirs spouses and children, My husband and children, and their spouses and children. I love the gospel and its teachings. I love the promise it gives that we can be together forever if we but endure. I love the gospel teachings that we are to bear one another's burdens that they may be light, because in that I know that I will never be alone to face the difficulties in my life. That my family and my gospel family will always be there to help and strengthen me. I am grateful for the country of my birth. I am grateful that as Americans we are willing to stand up for what is right and good and true and help others less fortunate in the world. That we are willing to protect those who a more vulnerable from the terrorists and dictators and really bad people that are out there. I'm grateful that as a people we don't just sit back and say it's their problem or their fault that the evils in the world are targeting them. I'm grateful that as a people and a world we are realizing that no one exists in a vacuum. That we have one world and we need to treat with everyone as though we were brothers, as we indeed are. Most of all I'm grateful for a kind and loving Heavenly Father, who planned for it all. Yes I can really say with all my heart this has been the best Thanksgiving ever!
This last Month has been so busy! - Dad came to visit and very soon realized the best thing for him to do was stay. He spent a weekend in the hospital and has had a doctor's appointment almost every day since. Granted many of those appointments were for IV therapy - but still this last month has been basically going from one appointment to another. Dad is suffering now for the hard work and heroic deeds of his "youth". His kidneys aren't doing well and his back is fractured and pinching nerves which is causing a lot of pain. Through it all he is stoically persevering. When the pain makes him grit his teeth and turn pale and green he says, "one thing's for sure - it will start feeling better when it stops hurting!" He bears more without complaint than I would be able to bear and remain conscious. His heart aches for his beloved wife. All in all I wonder which pain is the hardest for him to bear.
Where this last year has been hard - it has not been the hardest year of my life. in many ways it has given me some of my most precious memories. It has also given me the best perspective and appreciation of life and its challenges and blessings. I am so grateful for all the blessings I've been given. For my family, my parents, my brothers and sisters, theirs spouses and children, My husband and children, and their spouses and children. I love the gospel and its teachings. I love the promise it gives that we can be together forever if we but endure. I love the gospel teachings that we are to bear one another's burdens that they may be light, because in that I know that I will never be alone to face the difficulties in my life. That my family and my gospel family will always be there to help and strengthen me. I am grateful for the country of my birth. I am grateful that as Americans we are willing to stand up for what is right and good and true and help others less fortunate in the world. That we are willing to protect those who a more vulnerable from the terrorists and dictators and really bad people that are out there. I'm grateful that as a people we don't just sit back and say it's their problem or their fault that the evils in the world are targeting them. I'm grateful that as a people and a world we are realizing that no one exists in a vacuum. That we have one world and we need to treat with everyone as though we were brothers, as we indeed are. Most of all I'm grateful for a kind and loving Heavenly Father, who planned for it all. Yes I can really say with all my heart this has been the best Thanksgiving ever!
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
I'm just taking it easy.
Whew! I finally have a minute to sit and just type! This week has been really crazy. Dad came to visit last Saturday and is staying for a week or so. Saturday was also shopping and getting things together for the week. Sunday was Stake Conference - Bob decided I should sleep instead so we missed a really great conference that was direct broadcast from SLC. We had Karen Adams (my sister) and her family as well as the missionaries over for dinner and family home evening. We had a spiritual message by the missionaries (who are both new to the ward - 4 days- and new to missionaries - one at 4 days and one at 6 months.) Monday Dad was helping Becky with her rabbits. He knows so much more about taking care of animals than anyone else I know. He got through to Becky how important it is to keep things neat and clean and organized. Taught her how to prepare the alfalfa for the rabbits (I didn't know that needed to be done). Now we have very happy rabbits. I'm happier too, because even though it about killed me, everything out there is CLEAN! I managed to hurt my back Tuesday and spent a very painful afternoon and evening in bed. Dad had been retaining water and about 11:00 he realized that it was getting really bad really fast. Off to the ER. We got there about 11:30. After the Dr checked him out she ordered a large IV dose of his diuretic. It was about 1:00 by the time they got to administer the meds. 45 minutes later (and a quart lighter) instead of looking like his legs and feet were going to explode he had wrinkles. All in all it was a pretty "fast" ER visit - we were only gone a little over 3 1/2 hours by the time we got home. The lab work showed his kidneys aren't doing well so now we have to find a Dr to follow up. The ER referred him to a Dr - who isn't accepting new patients. Our family doctor got sick and had to suddenly retire so it's just as well I have to look - I'd be looking anyway. Also the last 3 days has been a monumental effort to get Becky caught up with her school lessons. She was behind 2 full days of lessons Monday morning, added to the usual 5 lessons for that day. It took a lot of effort and concentration - something she's not real big on - but WE DID IT! As of now she has all her schoolwork and one of tomorrows lessons done. Looking at what I've done over the last 4 days I'm not surprised I'm exhausted! So for the rest of the day? I'm just taking it easy!
Monday, October 20, 2008
Today is just one day.
I'm sitting here feeling overloaded and overwhelmed. I'm trying not to feel sorry for myself, but it is definately an uphill battle. I spent the entire weekend in bed because it hurt so bad to try to walk it just wasn't worth it. (I really got up quite a bit - it just really hurt when I did.) I stayed in my most comfy pj's and read, slept or watched TV. It is amazing to me how tired just being in pain makes you. I'm beginning to loose hope that whatever is causing this is going to be easy to fix. And beginning to wonder if I can look forward to a life anytime soon.
Becky is so wonderful, and so frustrating. At times she seems so grown up, I forget she is still just a little girl. She's every bit as tall as I am - and since I was well under 5 foot until I was well over 15 it is really easy to expect a lot from her. Most of the time she's great and I go along floating and thinking wow - how did I get so lucky. Then there is the other stuff. Like most kids Becky isn't really fond of doing her chores. That is all inclusive, getting the dishes done and her room clean is easier done for her. And every time I'm tempted to do them for her I can hear Mom saying, "Why don't you love your daughter enough to teach her. Don't leave her unable to care for her family and herself."
When Mom was growing up she was the youngest of the girls, and since her sisters were older and more "capable" she was left out when it came time to do anything constructive. After much needling she was fianlly allowed to dust the furniture and iron the hankies. Other that that she was sent out to play. After her papa died and her mom had to go to work, Mom still didn't have much to do with the regular chores. At that point Mom was almost through High School. Can you imagine? One day after a long day working at the VA Hospital and a long ride home on the bus grandma came in and asked Mom if she couldn't have at least started dinner. It had never occured to Mom that it was a possibility. The next day Grandma came home to Mom's "dinner" - she had opened and heated up a can of beans. Grandma did all the cooking after that.
After her marriage she had to learn to cook and clean. It was hard going and I notice for years Dad was quite thin in the family pictures. By the time I came along Mom was quite a good cook and baker. Even with that she was determined to teach me all that she knew. When I got old enough (I started fixing dinner as per her instructions when I was 7) I took over basically all the cooking. My family cried as I left to get married - they had to go back to Mom's cooking. She was a good cook - I'm just better. What can I say - she was able to teach me how her mother cooked, even though she had never been able to do that herself.
All in all Mom left me much better prepared for life than she had been. I will just have to grit my teeth and stand my resolve and teach. That is a much more difficult job than doing! So off I go to love and nurture and teach my precious daughter. I can do that today - I can! And today is just one day.
Becky is so wonderful, and so frustrating. At times she seems so grown up, I forget she is still just a little girl. She's every bit as tall as I am - and since I was well under 5 foot until I was well over 15 it is really easy to expect a lot from her. Most of the time she's great and I go along floating and thinking wow - how did I get so lucky. Then there is the other stuff. Like most kids Becky isn't really fond of doing her chores. That is all inclusive, getting the dishes done and her room clean is easier done for her. And every time I'm tempted to do them for her I can hear Mom saying, "Why don't you love your daughter enough to teach her. Don't leave her unable to care for her family and herself."
When Mom was growing up she was the youngest of the girls, and since her sisters were older and more "capable" she was left out when it came time to do anything constructive. After much needling she was fianlly allowed to dust the furniture and iron the hankies. Other that that she was sent out to play. After her papa died and her mom had to go to work, Mom still didn't have much to do with the regular chores. At that point Mom was almost through High School. Can you imagine? One day after a long day working at the VA Hospital and a long ride home on the bus grandma came in and asked Mom if she couldn't have at least started dinner. It had never occured to Mom that it was a possibility. The next day Grandma came home to Mom's "dinner" - she had opened and heated up a can of beans. Grandma did all the cooking after that.
After her marriage she had to learn to cook and clean. It was hard going and I notice for years Dad was quite thin in the family pictures. By the time I came along Mom was quite a good cook and baker. Even with that she was determined to teach me all that she knew. When I got old enough (I started fixing dinner as per her instructions when I was 7) I took over basically all the cooking. My family cried as I left to get married - they had to go back to Mom's cooking. She was a good cook - I'm just better. What can I say - she was able to teach me how her mother cooked, even though she had never been able to do that herself.
All in all Mom left me much better prepared for life than she had been. I will just have to grit my teeth and stand my resolve and teach. That is a much more difficult job than doing! So off I go to love and nurture and teach my precious daughter. I can do that today - I can! And today is just one day.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Naptime
It's Naptime!Mom was getting pretty tired, but she didn't want to be out of the loop - so we set her up on the couch and when she was tired she just took a nap.
Beth and her family had come up to see Mom and Dad and both great grandma and Alyssa were taking a much needed nap. Of course we had to get pictures!
I miss Mom - I suppose I always will. However I'm beining to look at the pictures we got as we knew her life was drawing to a close and getting some comfort from them. I'm so glad we had some warning so we could take the time to spend with her and get the pictures we wanted. Or at least we tried to get the pictures we wanted.
I can tell this is one that I will cherish.
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